Liberation From Being Right
On a recent retreat, one participant was the king of being right. He had built his whole professional identity around being the person with the answers.
Do you get a deep sense of satisfaction from being right?
That’s a natural part of being human. Our brains are built to solve problems, seek certainty, and make sense of the world.
It becomes about safety. Stability in a sea of uncertainty. Being needed when we’re haunted by a feeling of ”not enough.”
On a recent retreat, one participant was the king of being right. He had built his whole professional identity around being the person with the answers.
So naturally, when things began to open up on the retreat, his instinct was to understand everything intellectually. To grasp it with his mind.
He told us he couldn’t express how he felt.
But the intellect is the one place you can’t find this.
After some initial defensiveness (completely normal), he began to realise he wasn’t going to find the answers by trying to “be right.”
At one point he said:“I feel confused. I don’t know what’s going on.”
A huge smile spread across his face.
Then he laughed and said: “I don’t know… and it doesn’t matter!”
That sentence became a motto for the group for the rest of the weekend.
You could see the relief move through his whole body.
As the retreat went on, he began feeling things more deeply, especially in his gut, and became a leader for the rest of the group, helping others let go a little more too.
Now, back at work, he says he’s listening differently. Noticing more. Really connecting with the other senior leaders from the retreat, as well as with his clients and mentees.
When we stop trying so hard to be right.
When we let go just that bit more, and discover what else there is to see, feel, and experience in life and work.
